“In MTG, a Proxy is like a Strap-on, it may make you feel better but it doesn’t make you any more a man.”

“I blame Rock Band for Justin Bieber.”

“I like to believe in alternate timelines. Hopefully in one of them Firefly wasn’t Cancelled.”

“Automated palm trees are a necessity if you want to have cinematic takeoffs in your Jet”

“I don’t compensate for my size, I exploit it.”

“I’m like Han Solo. You can trust me to be an asshole, but show up last minute to save the day.”

“Dr Horrible’s sidekick was the best. I mean he could make ladies moist just by touching them.”

Nuff Said

“Top 1% of abras holds 90% of their shit. Don’t see anyone complaining about that.”

“My Balls are like the TARDIS. They’re bigger on the inside.”